A Russian Wife as a Natural Disaster: “Idiot Savant” on Alien Turf, or Higher Comfort – Lower Gravity

Omission & presumption of “default” routine procedures wreck more international marriages than cultural barriers do. Honest well-wishing care does not inoculate us from screwing up. “She’s a novice – you’re the boss” is but an illusion of control.

Ask Joseph. ) With experience like his in Russian / Ukrainian travels, relationships and business, you won’t need a Buddhist course in tranquility.

Your native Consumer’s Paradise and your woman’s native Consumer’s Purgatory impose different gravity. Former Soviet people may need time to accommodate physical effort they are used to applying to mechanisms, to quit “household tips” on inventive use of handy means, and sometimes to unlearn pushing on people (though unobtrusive politeness is recommended to foreigners in Eurasia, too). Plus they have to master the “space technology” of Western legal regulations and forms where every word, action, or omission has consequences.

Big City Girl: Who’s the Man of her Dreams? Russian jocular classification

So different by styles, habits and characters, so alike by dreaming of love’s bliss… Here’s a gallery of most vivid female types – and their potential husbands. Call it a set of caricatures that street artists have been fudging anyplace and anytime, changing only markers, – but so far as this article is published in urban reading, let its author refrain from remorse.

Natural Dating vs. Matchmaking Brief: basic methods for men & women – advantages and disadvantages in a SWOT list

Ironically, matchmaking is the oldest way to marriage. Sage women or parents have done it since the dawn of humanity. Deliberate choice of life partner has grown into “Western” and “Russian” custom in c. XX, and still relies on social proof. Pondering on current divorce rates and the tragic vibe of known love stories, does third party assistance make sense? Let’s rationally weigh all pro’s and con’s (pun unintended…)

Virgin Village & Smalltown vs. Babylon City? Russian Brides Background Effect

To a Western man searching Russia / Ukraine for unspoiled virtue, health, high moral values, sound family background, top model beauty, unconditional love, and proper mothering of his children, - hinterland is the last area to seek a wife. Post-Soviet specifics of economy and mentality contradict American-based reasoning on the percentage of “sound” or “flawed” women in small communities, of “deserving” or “evil” girls who relocate upscale, and of “fine” or “filthy” city-borns.

A keen observer can discern a range of more specific social types. A psychologist would consider the entire combination of individual factors to make a right match. And it takes a native to detect ancestry & upbringing by manners, speech, style, even by facial features. But let’s now clarify the first-approximation guidelines.

How do major factors of origin affect a Russian or Ukrainian woman’s character? What marriage behavior can a stranger forecast by them?

Here are some trends you need to know. Feels bad to spill – and to conceal.

First mention & counter-arguments

“Less Talk, More Meaning”: Russian Women’s Reason – User’s Guide

Responding to discussion on this must-read by Master GL, here’s an overview of, errm, “Russian Woman (TM) Communicator”, from home production to foreign handling.

Beg your tolerance to my debris of radioelectronics )

• Childhood: Wired as Hi-Fidelity

The first thing that little children are taught here, is to speak truth.

Scam or Real? First visit to a Russian woman: Who Where

On comment 42 to this post at GL’s. More on scam schemes here

Hi Rob, I can imagine your confusion. This letter appears controversial as well as authentic. Here are some thoughts I got…

First, considerations natural from a woman’s viewpoint, that usually scare men.

“Bad” Body Language: the Filthiest Post on Russian Women & Western Men Interaction

Even if your could-be-bride is a fan of Mr. Bean, – mimicking his manners won’t make you her hero. In the basics of Russian cultivation, grimaces and physiological manifestations fall under certain censorship.

Which makes this post important beyond romantic contacts. However polished the stranger may be…

Slavic norms of public / interpersonal conduct allow much less natural motions than accustomed abroad (especially in America). Some may be judged as, without much exaggeration, crime against civility! And civility’s one of the first virtues which Foreign Men are given credit for.

Russian Inaccuracy and the Order of Magnitude, or Chocolate as Crime

West vs. East is the clash of Rules vs. Context. Who overdares? Eurasia.

• Exercise 1. Is there anything wrong about these statements?

1. “If I can’t rely on you with small things, how can I trust you with big things.”

High Heels and Fancy Women: Russian Stories with Morals

On beauty, prostitutes, good women, gender roles, consumerism and compensation – through the cultural difference of Former Soviet Union countries

• Story 1

I’ve just watched a TV show “Beauty Factory (Made in Ukraine)”, where they take “visually challenged” women and improve their lives with surgery, stylist crafts, psychology backup. Boyfriends fall on their knees to make proposals, bosses promote, children start listening to the Fairy agape… This time even the show team couldn’t hold tears at the happy end, neither could I…

What Makes a Russian Woman Happy?

Russian press loves to poll celebrities as same people, who have something to tell, fortified by the authority of their achievement and attraction. Here is the poll by one of the oldest popular newspapers “Arguments and Facts” on the occasion of the “International” Women’s Day March 8.

“What’s a Woman’s Happiness to you?”

A Russian pop song says that “Woman’s Happiness is to have the loved man near, and nothing else is needed.” It describes

How to Win a Beautiful Russian Woman: The Different Standard and the Art of Compliment

You find her hot and this fact is welcome in her culture. Shall you express utter admiration? Answer: No. When all the kin is bred beautiful, and smart, it’s a minefield playground!

That foreign worship of Slav looks is like Indians’ shock at White Man and his utensils. It is rather uncomfortable to be deified for what has been ordinary. On the other part, it’s rather miserable to take occasional scrap for treasures. And rather dangerous to drink “fire water” after generations of abstinence.

10 More Golden Rules for Advanced First-Time Dating International

A link to send Russian & Western online friends ;)

• 1. If something feels like offending you, it was NOT intended to.

Joseph calls it “Girfriend Rule #1”, I call it “Disclaimer”. Always mind the cultural and linguistic differences, added to individual styles!

“Forbidden Words” Top 10: Messages and Self-Descriptions Not Recommendable as to get you an “Ideal Partner”

These innocent phrases in a profile, email, talk (yours or hers) – resemble customary markers of “Co-Dependency” infection (as opposed to wholesome Mutual Treasuring). Keep cool, as you present yourself or hear that woman doing so! Are they mere figures of speech, or configurations of thinking?

Big Heart: An exemplar Ukrainian mother, wife, businesswoman, and more! (Part II)

This great small lady is in her mid-40s. A slender brunette, born in a town of 45000 people and educated to be a kindergarten coach (just like her mother). Which turned a starvation job in the surly time of the Soviet Union collapse.

“Playboy” Advice & Fake Orgasms, or Is a Russian Woman a Trustworthy Guide to Russian Ladies

Guys’ eyes are valuable mirrors. But a Russian Girl ™ can bewitch any guy… not another Russian Girl ™. What may let – and make – the latter help, and whom?

New Bride Scam Art Technology Alert or Just Life? Sophisticated Gentle Goes Far

“Now All Big Smart Boys don’t let us skin them – let us milk them.” Petty pay as you play, and then… you just didn’t match. Russian men call it “Dynamo”, meaning bad-faith “consummation”. What’s ironic is that the “normal” traditional Eastern dating, or e-dating, procedure begins the same way.

The difference is in the result… and in subtlest red flags on the way, which your good auld Natalia’s there to tell.

Greater irony is that man can even feel grateful for every moment of being “used”! These Special Russian Women.™

(Or it takes a special man to choose enlightenment against despair?)

Thank a client who authorized me to tell his story on one finest Dynamo machine business for Ukraine. It looked [almost] innocent for as long as two dozen letters. But “however long a rope weaves, it comes to an end”.

“Too good to be true” Russian Brides Black Lists (Scam or Life – II)

Another lesson inspired by a Clien’ts story (quoted courtesy of).

“First I want to say that in my heart I believe she’s genuine. I like her very much, and I haven’t approached her with suspicion, nor do I want to.

I happened to run across ["this forum"], where a bunch of guys were discussing – her! Her letters to one of them.

I’ve seen a couple scam girls’ emails. They’re pathetic and transparent, if you think about them with the big head. These are nothing like that. I’m so confused.

Once I start reading these scam sites, it’s so easy to think “Oh my god, what if this, what if that?” I read all of the posts there and quickly realized

12 Reasons Why International, particularly Russian-American Marriages Can Fail

Just one Google dig into Runet (Russian-language Internet) for mere stats on international divorce rate brought 34 600 sites and pages of serious research and personal experiences… Here are some molecules of this information, rather representative of the whole substance.

Cinderella Code to Russian Women’s Virtues, Expectations, Attitudes and Charms

Pick the role of “Poor Thing’s Prize” or poke into that shallow “Silver Platter To Females”, and you’ll miss a host of differences behind the axiom that

“to Western men, we are all Cinderellas by default; to Russian women, you are all Princes by default.”

It’s high time to anatomize the totem of Russian women.

Over-Undress, Sexy Photos, Accessibility and Misconceptions: Russian Brides at the Mating Arena

The West has had its sexual revolution fever; in the Former Soviet Union, it’s in the phase of Revolutionary Government established. Both Vanguard and Reaction can be found among young Russian women seeking a relationship, whom you can meet in the living streets and online.

Miss Faithful vs Mr Chastity Belt: Why Needn’t Have Jealousy for a Russian Wife or Bride

Do Russian Women Cheat? It depends. Female adulteries need a special post, as deflections from norm. Now let’s discuss Russian cultural norms. Before an encouraging conclusion, I must address the part that some Western men interdict as treason (discrediting their reason).

Beauty, the Russian Women’s Cult: A Moral Category and Value Added

“Beauty will Save the World!” To Russian (Ukrainian) women, it’s a slogan for high personal standards, as well as demands. Beauty is a valuable asset, precious to sustain as well.

Down-to-Earth Goddesses: A Real Russian Woman Secret Oath

Behold in Awe you noble Stranger, for you’ve got the luck to be admitted to the heart of the Mystique of Russian Women!

Happy Husband, Children and Career: How Can a Russian Wife Manage it All

Russian women are famous as resourceful, enduring, energetic and dependable. In the Soviet and early transition economies, they carried their families (and the society) on their shoulders, homemaking AND breadwinning, while most their men lay mazed with Communist limits and market challenges. New opportunities didn’t add accountability to Russian men… to women, they did.

Actually, the youngest generation of Russian (Ukrainian) Brides, entering the marriageable age of 17 next year, would be the Fourth Generation of Children Raised by Working Mothers.

Why, how, with what results and feelings have Russian Women been carrying out double responsibilities, – here are the facts from our social history and breathing stories of the women I immediately know.

Russian Princess Syndrom in a Russian Woman’s poetry

“Princess-in-Tower” way is a ponderable issue with Russian Women’s dating roles & love manners. It is timeless passive poise awaiting genuine courtship, arousing romantic instincts, and bashing hasteful lovermen. Also it may be concealing feelings like a prisoner under examination, with resistance and evasion ranging from movie-style joky grace to queer hostility.

You may be facing it for quite a long time, because there are no gaming games here. All our impersonal friendliness or protective skittishness evolve from the famous axiom that we Russian Women are a relationship-serious clan. What are the implications then?

Normal Husbands from Hell, or Why could “Realistic” Russian Women ignore and divorce Western Men

The word-of-mouth repute of Russian Wife™ unique “consumer benefits” attract or bring out some traits in men, which Russian Women can’t bear, and strive to exclude. This is a big yet still surprising reason why Western Men and “brides” from Eastern Europe, seeking a true match, succeed so scarcely in a long time, and why so many international marriages fail early.

(Green Card hunters? Yep there are many. But suppose you want a woman of sound mind, why would she take the man just for dumping him and going on her own in an alien country – while she can wait and find a good man to love, and have all the happinesses for ever? Anti-fraud: here)

See the Top Black List gallery of male types on the international dating fair that Russian Women most frequently meet… and most aversely avoid, without even letting know what’s happened (out of a traditional, heart-felt and learnt “why-spite-a-cripple” attitude).

Do our visions of “norm” and sense of “realistic” differ?

Paradox Relationships in Paradox Society: Men & Women in Russia or Ukraine

Now you can finally outline and explain the paradoxes of this land, so astonishing to strangers! Watch the symbol of the Orthodox religion, fundamental to the Russian, Ukrainian, Belarus and largely Soviet culture that reaches from private desires to the order of government. A cross is like a reference frame stretched between the extremes, – contrasts at the ends of axes, varieties between, and balance in the intersection.

So whatever you wanted to know… Yes, every tiny peculiarity. Did you notice that the Orthodox Cross has buds on ends that make each branch crossed once more? ;) The posts below would show how major conditions of the region’s geography, economy and history have shaped the daily life of “Russian” people and their way of thinking.

Happy & Friendly ! ? Russian Ladies’ “Keep-the-Face” mentality

3 Key Rules of Russian Girls: Be Nice. Be Nice to Men. Be Nice to Strangers. No hypocrisy, – an attitude. Still more care and caution you should take, dealing with these beautiful Eastern women who smile so peacefully.

Fast-Find the Right-One Russian Bride Know-How Procedure

“There are no mistakes in life, just feedback”. Let us better feed by our gains! Here’s a time-saving and all-round efficient algorithm to manage the “Embarrass of Abundance“ (or “Paralysis of Choice”) in 5 steps and a single universal test.

Finding a Russian (Ukrainian) Wife: Travels, not Agency or Online Dating? Advantages & Disadvantages, Mistakes & Success Tips

Suppose you’ve stuck your index into the map, arranged a secure stay and hopped on a plane. Where are you going to meet the girls – and how?

Is There Feminism in Russia (Former Soviet Union)?

In the global village, Former Soviet women have access and exposure to all Western baits, long-banned and currently-imposed. Yet

Behind the Russian Beauties’ Photos

Before penetrating into the curves and crinkles of face-reading, let’s linger on 3 most disputed Russian-Brides-Online photo issues concerning “Is-She-Real-and-Good”.

Russian Girls to Unhappy Men: A Poisonous Remedy

When you are broken-hearted, angry or annoyed at women, disappointed with your marriage or unsatisfied with other things in life, it fancies so sweet to find consolation at the breast of some kind, patient, lively, thoughtful, interested, understanding beauty who believes in true love like you believe you do. And here we are the “Russian women” grown as Soothers, Healers and Supporters. What a promising prospect for an acute or chronic injured one… a prospect leading to nowhere… at best.

(DISCLAIMER: What I am hereinafter telling to a “sore” man, is vice versa applicable to “sore” women one can often meet among Russian brides, – with the only difference that women fancy hanging all their problems on a “strong shoulder” that a real gentleman is so longing to provide. And “baggage” is a red flag problem with a woman just like with a man. GL please drop me the link to your post quoting Arnold Schwarzenegger’s lecture to his fiancée!)

One in a Million: “Beauties.Ru / Jealousy.net / Surfeit.com”

Online dating is a special reality, where general laws of relationship behaviour get deflected by the special conditions. No use decrying; much use in making allowance for the “different physics”, as if when scuba-diving or walking on the Moon. Likewise for introduction services and marriage agencies.

• Navigating in the World of Opportunities

The most burning – and the most ridiculous question to ask or hear from a Russian Bride Online is, “Do you have some other man” (or “girl”, respectively). “Yes” is condemned to be a red card answer (isn’t it? ;)). “No” is a yellow card, so symbolically as yellow used to stand for lies, jealousy and cheating in the old Russian “flower language”.

So best policy is what should make the “tango rules” for BOTH e-partners (share this link with your real friends and virtual / potential lovers):

Why So Many Beautiful Women in “Russia” (Eastern Europe)?

In the Former Soviet Union, beauty is a MUST for women. The multitude of reasons have History, Survival and Dignity in their common denominator.

Genetics

There’s an observation that best genes come up when different races match. (So do less viable genes, to be sifted away more quickly.) For ages, Russia, Ukraine, Belarus (to some degree) and Eastern regions of the Former Soviet Union have been witnessing different peoples’ migrations, invasions, forced relocations, as well as massive missions for trade, work and education.

What hasn’t worked with the New World?

The Top Must-Read to understand and enchant a Russian Woman

I hold my breath and sain myself. What I am sharing now is Absolute Ammunition targeted to win a Russian Woman’s heart. I hope it never gets into evil hands and would be only used for peaceful purpose. )

East + West > Marriage + Relationship > Psychology > Expert Counseling + Personal Secrets

Here he comes, passionate, intelligent and confident. We chat hours away, and then I see his inner boy. His shining armour is like chocolate’s foil to the teeth of some “bunny girl”. He’s about swording down princesses he takes for witches. Starving for human connection, orphaned from feminine care… And once again I turn Aunt AskNatalia.Ru to help one more soul rather than seek for the soul mate for myself. )

Thus began my e-counseling practice in psychology. Many times I felt blessed with friendship to a missioned professional analyst / therapist / coach lady I mention here and there as Dr. Tamara… as well as with my Ukrainian / Russian origin.

These Men have learnt stabbing their male rivals, juggling with big money, playing chess with the world, – yet feel lost at managing their personal lives. Yes, business and relationships are different disciplines, though not as incomparable as we are taught to think. But indeed, how should one operate in the world where definitions have fused?

“Manly” and “womanly” – “Western” and “Eastern” – “traditional” and “modern” – we are just too much alike… even though so different.

Luckily, Russian Women are seasoned soul-divers. ) Moreover, today’s generation of brides has been learning Men largely by foreign examples of. Which means, checking themselves through the eyes of foreign men – prevalently Western European and American.

How could it be?

Russian Woman Online: Losing Her, or Not? Calls, Emails, Instant Messenger Chats

“Where Have All the Young Girls Gone?” Another time you lose connection corresponding or communicating with your Russian (East European) Web date, love or bride, – check this. It may be “nothing personal” or a “personal nothing“.

• SHORT-TERM ABSENCE

The Digital Divide: Sit Back – No Setback

First thing to remember: Software Can Suck; Hardware Can Suck; Internet providers, cell phone operators suck; and when they can, they would – especially in Eastern Europe. Even most computer-savvy Russian girls online experience technical problems frequently… and face much man / woman misunderstanding caused by trifle bugs and differences.

How does a “Russian” woman communicate online?

Find it out by her activity hours (meaning HER time zone). But never write “She’s too Web active” or “She’s too scarce online” on your red flags.